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A penny earned

I’ve noticed pennies in parking lots lately. These poor, orphaned coins have just been layin outside the old Gazette and the YMCA in Guilderland. I’ve spotted a few on pavements owned by Price Chopper supermarkets, too.

I’m sure everyone just passes them by. After all, a penny doesn’t buy anything these days. A hundred pennies doesn’t buy much, either.

I used to step on and over the coppers — until I did the math. Here’s what I think about pennies now:

It takes me about a second to pick up a penny and add it to my vast financial resources. So if I was making 1 cent every second, I’d be making 60 cents a minute. If I’m making 60 cents a minute, that’s $6 for every 10 minutes. And $36 every hour.

So if I’m making $36 an hour for eight hours, that’s $288 a day. A day’s worth of dough at that rate equals $1,440 a week. Or $74,880 every year.

Now the old Gazette pays me a fair wage, but I’m not making $74,880 annually. At least, not yet.

So if I see a penny, I pick it up. These are hard times, after all.

And if I find a nickel or a dime, that’s more money in the bank. Wish people would start losing more quarters. I’ll be a millionaire in no time.

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